Dating a widowed man with kids
I have expressed how hurt this makes me feel to my partner. Should my partner continue to keep me from attending his family events where everyone else will be present at, just because one of his married children ‘isn’t ready yet”?
Another family event is coming up soon, and I have already been told by my partner that he will not ruin his relationship with his adult married child. I understood this better a year ago as I had not met everyone yet at that time, but now one year later and I have met everyone, and they have been more than accepting of us together as a couple. I feel he is not being sensitive to my feelings regarding this. Thank you What stands out here is the emphasis on the word “ready”.
We do know that the couple are dating for two years and despite the entire family being on board with the relationship, one adult married child is firmly holding out- seemingly asking his father to “choose” either a relationship with a significant other or with himself.
Perhaps there are other issues here that are being defined as “ready”-sometimes adult children worry about their parent’s finances/ their inheritance or are threatened that the new person will ”take away” the surviving parent’s affection and attention, especially if the new partner has children of her own.
“Ready” as you can see, can mean many different things. We must ask these children, “What is it that you are not ready for?
” In order for communication to flow freely and for the relationships to be healthy, we simply need to begin the conversation, “What does it mean to be ‘ready?
Or does it mean they are not ‘ready’ to accept the deceased parent’s passing?However, this information is as relevant for men dating widows.It also applies for families who experienced divorce.’ ” Then we need to listen to their fears and concerns without judgment or criticism.Sometimes asking what seems like the simplest of questions can clarify misgiving and open up a dialogue that can heal and restore relationships.